Monday, September 19, 2005
Starting this week, I'm going to take a break from just reporting on interesting new developments in the world of science to take a look at the institution itself. I can't count the number of times I've had young children rush up to me and ask, breathlessly and with hope in their eyes; "Hey Mr. Science Man, how do we make it big and win the Nobel Prize?" Actually, I could count the times if it had ever happened, but I'm going to keep pretending it's an everyday occurrence and therefore the basis of this piece.
The road to scientific glory and the plaudits it brings is a long one. I'm going to exempt the earliest stages, from reading books like Charlie Brown's Big Book of Questions and Answers (my own start in science) to activities like school science fairs and work placements in laboratories. I will mention, as a benefit to younger readers or parents who might want their children to get into research, that fainting at the first sight of a dissected mouse and then never coming back to the lab is a bad start to a summer internship.
From here we venture on to university. At this point, transatlantic differences begin to leap out, and I must ask my US readers to bear with me should I err. Once at university, you begin to learn that most of the things you've been taught up until now are wrong, or maybe they're right, but not for the reasons you've been told. You'll also learn that staying up late and drinking too much is fun, but getting up early, wearing a tuxedo and drinking too much is even better.
Depending where you're studying, you might even get your hands dirty on occasion with an experiment or two. However, budget cutbacks and increasing class sizes are a limiting factor for gaining hands-on experience. In recent years in my own field, computer-assisted learning has been the big thing, and instead of a real piece of guinea pig ileum twitching away in an organ bath, it'll be a virtual one. Better, perhaps, for the fluffy rodent, but much less chance for 'accidentally' poisoning your labmate.
In order to combat the allegations that the universities were turning out a generation of graduates without a clue when it comes to working in a lab, most science programs offer an extra-mural year, wherein the plucky young undergraduate heads off to work in a lab. Armed with bright notions about just how smart they are and how they'll be given their own lab, the institutes and companies that receive these precocious neophytes are just as pleased, knowing that they've got a source of cheap labor for the next twelve months, and point them in the direction of the washing up.
Despite the fact that one often gets saddled with the crap jobs, the extra-mural year is a vital step in the training of a scientist. Away from the classroom, essential basics such as how to make a serial dilution, what to do when you spill radioactive things on your jeans and how dry ice and eppendorfs make good booby traps are learnt through experience and repetition. Assuming you get a chance to work on more than one aspect of a project, it's also a good chance to start finding out which bits of science appeal and which don't. This is important, as there's a long way to go before you'll be done.
So you head back to Your U. to finish up and gain that precious B.Sc., delighting the family and surprising your doubting school teachers. You've learnt some practical experience working in a lab, you know one end of the forceps from the other and you're not running off to become an investment banker. So, next stop: Karolinska Institute, Sweden? Well, not quite. Having a bachelors degree in science is essential, but only having one can be detrimental, depending upon one's desired endpoint. If you're happy to work in a lab, have a certain amount of job security, want a pension and benefits and don't feel like spending the rest of your life writing grants, then now is a good time to apply for jobs. I am not going to say anything bad about technicians—I've worked with some marvelous techs, and they all got paid more than I did. But if you want to one day run your own lab, or work with much autonomy, then you're not done yet. Not by a long shot. Off you go to graduate school!
